4 months at RVR

I'm home for christmas and am so thankful to God that I've been able to intern at the Ranch this year. It's getting me out of every comfort zone that I enjoy. Yes, I enjoy my comfort zones. I don't really like to lead and be in charge. I'd rather take orders in the background. I don't like coming up with ideas either...all these things I am having to do. I'm not a task oriented person either, service is not a gift I excel in. (I'm realizing that even though I'm not task oriented the gift of service doesn't have a lot to do with that. It's an attitude of the heart and I am asking the Lord to give me a willingness to do things unto Him because it's not really a task it's putting others first!) When the Gospels talk about serving I know that I am not the servant that Christ was on earth...and I really want to grow in this area. RVR has really helped me in this area, serving. Rather than resisting altogether I am more eager to do so and I know it's God if I am ever serving instead of sitting. I love the real life aspects of the Ranch. Working with the people you live with can bring a lot of drama to the surface- so far things are awesome and we are working together well . I'm really excited about knowing the interns more and working together better...but so far it has really been a blessing that these girls have been awesome to work with. I'll be starting into the course work of the masters degree that I am working on through Baptist Bible College in PA. So we'll see how that goes. So far RVR has turned out to be way more learning than I ever learned in the tunnel of books and college - so getting a masters while I am there feels right. I love the feeling of being stretched and growing is fun.

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these are some pictures we took while hiking the AT in PA and going to Baltimore for lunch w/the Ranch ....this is leisure time obviously=)

Home

So, the Ranch is becoming a little more like home! Which is cool. The interns just got back from a three day trip. We went canoing down a river with rapids- it was awesome. Went climbing at an indoor tower and hiking on the AT. great times.
Also last weekend was the most fun I've had here at the Ranch working. I was with 5 teens and we just had some real and awesome conversations about the Lord. Very encouraging and so fun to hang with these people who love the Lord and want to follow after Him!
Hope to be adding some more pictures soon.

Florida group from a Bible College

I got to hang out with this group for one day. We did a huge cleaning job in part of our dinning facilities here. I really enjoyed this group because they were halarious, worked hard, and were committed to seeking Christ. We were able to have some conversations about Christ and what He is currently teaching us and how we're seeking Him. These girls are from all over the United States and lots of different personalities that work well together. They were definitely fun to hang out with!

Encouragement

This past week at the ranch has been a real encouragement to my heart. I have been doing a lot of work, and have been faced with selfishness on my part which has been discouraging. I was praying Monday before we started work on Tuesday and the Lord did so many things to tell me, "I know, I see, I care, stay the course..." The interns went on a trip to the Inner Harbor in Baltimore. While we were there we went to the biggest Barnes and Noble I've ever seen...I found a book that I have been wanting to read, 'Surprised by Joy', C.S.Lewis. I was so thankful for this read because I realized how much I need to count my relationship to God as precious and a the biggest treasure. I want to be more thankful for my salvation...living w/o God is a horrible thing. C.S.Lewis's life of searching for joy ended when He found Christ, which wasn't about joy at all but a relationship. It's interesting when we find that joy isn't the answer either, but knowing Christ...what a surprise!

This weekend I was the worker host and we were able to have some good times together...especially talking about God. These high-schoolers really have a lot against them spiritually and it's terribly sad. 90% of them walk alone in their relationship with God...which makes it way harder. We talked a lot about the hindrances of getting into the Word...everyone wants to but there are many obstacles. From being too busy, not understanding the Word, getting so board with church you wonder why you should read the Bible, not being challenged to think spiritually, and desiring other things. I'm asking God to show me how to encourage these awesome students in their walks with God.
What a miracle it is to know God and walk with Him every day!

Woodmont Catholic School

this is Juliana and Maggie. Juliana is in the 6th grade and one of the most sharp kids i've ever met. She really made me laugh because of her responses to some of the activities we did. One was the trust fall (which most of you probably know) You stand about 6 feet up then you fall into the arms of those below. Juliana's eyes got really really big as she was standing on the platform facing me and about to fall backwards...then she fell and was caught. As soon as she got up she said, "you feel like you're going to die, but you won't." it reminds me of how hard it is for some of us to actually trust people...wow.
Maggie is interning through the catholic church for one year and she serves also at the school. We had a great conversation about truth and encouraged each other to seek Christ and not get polluted by the world (entertainment, money, and the emptiness of the world...)

this is chelsea and she has a real heart for the Lord. we had a special twislers moment because we both love them. she's been an encouragement to work with thus far.

some of the worker crew

this is katie one of the weekend workers and she is holding a picture of her special blue juice...she also gives one amazing hug and i'm looking forward to getting to know her more. she's really energetic and knows alot about the ranch because of past summers and retreats.

the worker crew

on the weekends the retreats are run by the host, support host, and worker host.
The host and support host work with the group leaders and facilitate all the activites that go on here (zip line, paint ball, climbing tower, horses, and more). the worker host hangs out with 4-7 high school students that make sure the meals happen. so we set the dinning hall, do all the dishes, serve and bus tables, and clean the dinning hall. we work with doug who is the chef here. and we hang out 24/7 from friday night until sunday afternoon. this is a great time for bible study, games, work, and hanging out. this is the group that i hung out with (in the pic). i can't wait to do it again because i have a lot of ideas. this was the first time i have been the worker host, but there is potential to make a huge difference in these kids lives because you are with them all the time and my aim is going to be encountering God those weekends with them.

cleaning day

just for fun too...

sunrise

this is at the top of the camp at Fort Roller. Since the ranch is literally in a valley the sunrises and sunsets aren't seen to well, but this is pretty cool...enjoy!

truck jump

we also practice for the olympics in off time at Rutter's gas station

zip line

this is the old zip line ride. we will be starting the new one in a couple weeks and are mulching the trail now. The trail has to be mulched because the soil is very rocky and unless you build up the trail to cover up the rocks you can't really get up the trail without tripping along. it's a lot of work getting the mulch up the trail.
So far the interns have been doing a lot of manual labor. cleaning from the summer is a big job. we're also cleaning out cluttered buildings and organizing them for more efficient use. At the same time retreats are coming in and we are learning how to lead them which will take a few months... then we will lead them!

this is a picture of Morgan and me on the way to our leadership retreat at Sandy Cove in Northwest , MD. This was a group of about 30 people, the whole staff at the Ranch. Our retreat was soo refreshing to me. I felt so blessed to be apart of a ministry where the leadership seeks the Lord. We went through 2Chron. 20 where Jehosephat seeks God's face for direction. Instead of just making a bunch of plans for the Ranch we took one and a half days to just seek the Lord personally and then we came together as a group and shared what the Lord had showed us.
We also had awesome conversation while we were there. Every time we had a meal each table had certain questions we had to talk about that really helped us to stay on meaningful topics (ex. "What's the hardest thing you've been through"). I really enjoyed getting to know our team better.

Rumuda

this is us leaving the barn, Rumuda, and heading to the trail...

ridding

here's a clip of me trotting - very fun!
I will be starting to work with the horses and helping lead groups that come in! yeah.
Morgan, another intern, has been working with horses practically her whole life and I'll be ridding with her a lot and she's teaching me to ride.

Last week we trained on the high ropes course for the outdoor education groups that come in. We also trained on the zip line, low initiatives, and climbing towers.
The interns clean the ranch before groups come, which is more work than I would've thought. Janitorial work has a whole new respect in my mind. We also help with meal preparation, set the dinning room and clean up everything after ever meal.

the interns

The interns are myself, Betsy, Morgan (back left), Katie (back right), and Ben

my address

River Valley Ranch
Manchester MD 21102

i welcome letters of any kind!

River Valley Ranch

Dear Family and Friends,

It has been a while since I have written a letter like this. I never thought I would be getting into something like this, but I am so grateful the Lord has given such an open door to share His truth with others. I have been accepted an internship with an organization called River Valley Ranch in Manchester, Maryland. River Valley Ranch is a well established Christian Adventure Camp that has been reaching young people for Christ since 1952. Surprisingly, they want me to come and work with them for one year to reach lost people for Christ and help those who know Him to deepen their walks with Christ.

The internship begins August 27th and involves a variety of activities. The intern program offers college level Bible classes that I will be attending, many of them designed around experienced based learning. During the year we will plan and go on two outdoor adventure leadership trips, host weekend retreats where we present the gospel to local community groups, take care of housekeeping, hire the summer staff, prepare for over 3,000 campers for the summer, organize the annual corn maize and extreme expo skating demo, and facilitate outdoor education school groups. This camp has a ton to offer people: horses, white water rafting, rappelling, 800ft zip line, bouldering, and climbing activities. Their facilities provide an amazing place to share Christ. During the summer I will oversee a group of camp counselors. We will do Bible study and different things with them to help encourage them through the summer.

I am looking forward to the spiritual growth, sharing Christ with others, and possible professional direction afterwards. During the internship I will be staying at River Valley Ranch; they will provide housing and a living allowance. This internship requires that I raise a small amount of 1,500 for the year. Let me know if you would like to support me financially. Your prayers are greatly treasured during this time. I do not know what to expect, but I want to see more of who God is and serve with this community of believers wholeheartedly.

Blessings,
Melody Infinger


2810 Valyry Way
Cantonment, Fl. 32533

minfinger@liberty.edu

quote

"When I get honest, I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes. I believe and I doubt, I hope and get discouraged, I love and I hate, I feel bad about feeling good, I feel guilty about not feeling guilty. I am trusting and suspicious. I am honest and I still play games.
To live by grace means to acknowledge my whole life story, the light side and the dark. In admitting my shadow side, I learn who I am and what God's grace means. As Thomas Merton put it, "A Saint is not someone who is good but who experiences the goodness of God.""
-Brennan Manning from The Ragamuffin Gospel

These are journal entries from the summer when I was struggling to get free from sin. When I had to constantly dwell on what God said and persevere for my heart. This is a reflection of every moment in my mind and heart.

Journal entry from July
7-1-07

Wow, the month of July is here – God, I’m excited about this week. Enable me to get my work done and accomplish much. I think this paper is coming down to size. With you God it is possible… (academia is probably the biggest challenge that I ever face. Learning from reading and organizing my thoughts takes a ton of time.)
Make it hard not to walk in obedience. Release me from the fowler’s snare – only you can. For your name’s sake o Lord; I bear your name. I have been bought with the precious blood of Jesus. Make me live out the reality that I am His and He is mine. Don’t let me disobey you Lord. Make it hard to continue in disobedience. Lord Break my heart for You. Restore your joy to my soul.
In your presence there is fullness of Joy. Melody means a joyful life. That means my life is to be lived in the presence of God. I feel like I’m about to have a message to share: sin, obedience, joy. The mind controlled by the Spirit. A joyful life will happen when you live in the presence of God. No greater joy abounds than in the presence of God. Clean my heart. Let me walk in your wholeness. Take away my soul-ties except for yours O Lord. Cleanse me from the bondage of sin. Rain down your righteousness into my heart. I’m sad that I have to let go of the things you gave me that were great gifts, but I held onto the gift instead of having openness with it - but it’s worth it to give you all the control.

7-20-07

…the night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light!
Rather clothe yourself with the Lord Jesus and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature.
Lord Jesus, I cast myself at your feet. Be merciful to me. Deliver me from all my sin. Make me to not think about myself. God, I want to find you this summer. God, put my focus on you. Make me to walk as a child of light! Not groping around in my sin; that’s not was I was created for. I was created for you and living any other way doesn’t work. It makes you feel awful; it’s not peaceful. God, take me back to your light and create in me a clean heart. Press on to acknowledge You Lord. I long to be free.

7-21-07

You are from everlasting…set my heart on fire. Let me dwell in the light of your presence. God, I ask for an awesome focus today and tomorrow to write my paper. I ask for your presence, your power, your love, and control to guide me through this next week. God, I need your help. I desire so much to live for you. Make my mouth and heart close to you. I ask that one day I would be doing your work always. Showing others You. Build up the walls of Jerusalem. In your good pleasure make Zion prosper.


Savior like a Shepherd lead us much we need Thy tender care.
In Thy pleasant pastures feed us for our use Thy folds prepare.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus. Thou hast bought me I am yours.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus. You have bought me I am yours.

feelings ?? or truth

"cause i feel like it! okay!
three days ago i was reading an article on homosexuality that was explaining to children how to tell their parents they were gay. one of the main words used was: feel.
the article said for the person to say how long they had these feelings and then the article said, "it is such an overwhelming feeling."
the truth about feelings is that they often don't coincide with what is right. many of our feelings will lead us down a dark and more dark path.
i can sit here and think about all the things i have felt like doing before, a lot of them would have negative consequences. our society is a feeling driven atmosphere. we think that if we feel it then we are free to do it. but then at the same time most people will say that it's not okay to kill someone even if you feel like it....then why is it okay to wear a low cut top that shows too much skin or sleep with your boyfriend or have sex with anyone...cause it feels good? what kind of practical decision making is that?

where did my most intense feelings get me? what i thought felt good eventually turned into an unhappy mess. where did my most intense feelings flow from? hurt. those feelings have been reset because i took them to Jesus and are replaced now with healthy feelings that lead to healthy things. until we match our feelings with the Word we cannot be so sure as to follow them. this society has become much of what Romans 1 describes. God has given us over to our sinful desires. most of us feel sinful desires and because we don't know the truth we follow our feelings wherever they take us.
instead of allowing feelings to control you take your feelings to God and allow His Spirit to control you. You will enjoy your life far more.

ps. postmodernism flows from the mindset that you can do what you think is right for you. if you operate from that presupposition the things that you will think are right will flow from feelings and experiences.

the person of Christ suppressed

when i was living in sin- after a while - it was very clear to me that i literally felt like who i was in Christ was being suppressed. i had experienced what i believed God had created me to be... joyful, carefree person who was really happy. i was extremely unhappy in sin and i remember days when i would look in the mirror and say i am not happy at all...i can't even smile. there was no joy in my heart. my mind was not free... i had become a jealous, and angry person. it was not fun, at all. as soon as i walked the path of sin i felt myself turn into someone else inside. eww. 2.tim 2:20-26 talks about being taken captive to do the will of the devil. kinda scary.
Romans 8 says that the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace. that is the most true statement i know of when it comes to you being the person Christ has made you to be. your mind is full of life and peace. you can think very clearly and calmly. all this was taken away and my mind was cloudy and never at peace. there is no peace for the wicked. you think of talking to people and you just can't. you have nothing to give and it's because the enemy has used your sin to suck the life of Christ out of you. without Jesus Christ you cannot do anything - john 15. it is so true. (and you're responsible for your sin...i don't want it to sound like when i refer to the enemy that i'm blamming him. i am only saying that he will use your sin against you and he will gain authority in your life if you let him)
I was thanking God just today for the fact that i can think about things that are pure, right, things that are true. there is happiness and peace in my mind and heart. that i can just be myself...Gal 2:20
when you give yourself to Christ He truely makes you the person He wants you to be. That person is Jesus expressing Himself through your body and heart - your actions and the way you treat people...

Micah 7

18 Who is a God like you,
who pardons sin and forgives the transgression
of the remnant of his inheritance?
You do not stay angry forever
but delight to show mercy.

19 You will again have compassion on us;
you will tread our sins underfoot
and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.


I had this picture in my head of a man standing about 10 feet from the edge of a cliff and about 100 feet down was a deep and dark sea. I saw the man holding a huge bag, maybe something like the bag santa clause would hold if he existed. the bag was full of my sins and the man took two running steps, to gain momentum, and then literally hurled the bag of my sin into the sea! and it fell and fell then crashed into the waves and was forever lost. wow! who can throw away sin like that? not me. there's someone who has compassion towards me in my lowest estate? praise God that He actually delights to show mercy, to me!!! when you are truly thankful to God for hurling your sins it's because His death actually means something to you. it means something to you because you know what your sin is in the presence of a holy and just God. you haven't minimized your sin and said, "well i haven't done what he did." sometimes we come to the place where we really have to fall hard to realize what sinners we definitely are. without God's grace, left alone, where would you be? i don't know all the sinful things i would've done, but what i do know of i cringe- but because of Christ i have joy instead of fear. joy because He is able to keep me from falling and to present me before His thrown holy, without blemish.
those verses mean the world to me




8 Do not gloat over me, my enemy!
Though I have fallen, I will rise.
Though I sit in darkness,
the LORD will be my light.

9 Because I have sinned against him,
I will bear the LORD's wrath,
until he pleads my case
and establishes my right.
He will bring me out into the light;
I will see his righteousness.

10 Then my enemy will see it
and will be covered with shame,
she who said to me,
"Where is the LORD your God?"
My eyes will see her downfall;
even now she will be trampled underfoot
like mire in the streets.

There's another section of verses in Deuteronomy 33 that talks about God fighting for His people. it's a great comfort knowing that God Himself is fighting for us- He is our Shield, our Helper, and our Glorious sword, even when we are in sin. it's a great joy to know He has dealt with my sin especially when i realize that i've fallen. even though i have fallen and the enemy didn't want me to rise, but God has been faithful to bring me out into the light! Praise God for setting me free - i don't have to live that way anymore! what a peace that passes understanding

continue in sin ?

have you ever seen those people who sin and wonder if they really are born again? have you ever personally sinned, knew you were God's, and then you came to a point where you were at a place of decision. you had to decide if you were going to give yourself to sin or to God? when you were in sin you knew you were God's child, you even felt His presence? i know that in my sin i was still in God's hand and once my eyes were opened to the wrong i was doing i wanted God. then i had a choice. i saw the emptiness and heartache of sin. I think if we were really honest we've all been sinners while standing in grace. We are born again and still sin the difference is that we don’t continue in our sin. individual consequences might be different, but we've been aware that we are in sin. sometimes we chose to keep doing it. sometime we chose to stop.
i believe that the reason people sin (not all the time, but a lot of the time. because if you go back to the garden of eden adam and eve weren’t hurt, but they doubted and questioned what God had said. They believe the lie of satan over the true Word of God) is because they are hurting. until we learn how to receive the healing in Jesus wounds we will keep acting out of our own wounds and sin.
This part i'm about to write goes more in depth about what i wrote in 'getting out of sin.'
as i said before the human method for healing a wound is sin. The human method for getting anything it wants is sin. God's way is Jesus. how do you receive the wounds of Jesus as your healing? this passage of scripture is enlightening to me:
I Peter 1:9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. 10 Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.

11 Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul.
why do you think peter said that 'by His wounds we are healed?' do you feel healed?
have you ever been struggling with sin and someone told you that you just need to pray and read the Bible more? well that's true, but if you don't know how to pray and read the Bible the truth of God it will bounce right off your heart. Until God's truth removes your foundation (hurt, wounds – things there from sin) there is nothing that will make your actions change; scenarios: girls who want guys attention...maybe she never got that love and attention that a girl desperately longs for from her dad. maybe she's prideful about the way she looks, but why? what happened that made her act that way towards guys? if you trace back your problems you'll find that the foundation of your problem is a wound. and until you receive Jesus wounds you will not be healed. you receive this through prayer and the Word. really praying to God will do more that you can imagine. why else would Paul say that if you cast your anxiety's on the Lord that His peace will guard your heart more that you could've imagined. do you feel that - ever? maybe we humans really don't know what it means to fellowship with God. to really pray. to really cast a burden on Him. we continue walking around with all our hurt. we go round and round in our head, but cannot connect the dots to God. i have found that my wounds were healed when i did what i wrote about in 'sin: getting out of sin.'
if we were chosen BY GOD (now that's a masive deal) to be a royal priesthood, a holy nation...wow. and run from sin...because it will kill us for by His wounds you are healed. I challenge you to find that out for yourself. talk to me if you want about it, but I believe that Jesus wants to heal you of all your hurt so you can start acting out of holiness instead of pain, hurt, regret, and guilt. realize the difference between satan and Jesus. Light and darkness. life is so much a battle for your soul! not about what you should wear today, how well do my profs like me, how well did i do on that paper, does my brother like me, and more. how well is your soul? how alive is your soul? life is in His wounds.

one day i began to get physically ill. i felt this pressure in my chest, so heavy. at the time i thought it was the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I threw-up several times. I kept thinking, "okay, time to stop now." looking back what made me so sick was the fact that God lived me in, His temple and i was desicrating it- giving it to someone else. just like the israelites. satan was trying to take me for his will. it's like when you eat something you're allergic to...you get sick and throw up. i am born again and not made to digest the things of this world when i did i mixed myself with something my spirit is alergic to and i barfed - literally. the battle was raging inside me. satan was gaining power in my life

1 john 3:6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.
this verse is so true. if you live in Him there comes a point when sin just doesn't work anymore. it doesn't statify. it just can't. it just makes the wound deeper.


1 peter 2:24 He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.
you die to sin because you no longer have a desire for it. when you receive Jesus' healing you no longer have a thirst/desire for sinful things. that's why He died. until we receive the death of Christ in our bodies we won't receive His resurrection. By His wounds we are healed.

i don't know if any of this makes sense, but feel free to talk to me anytime if you want more details or just want to talk about what i wrote. even if you disagree

the new year

heidi howard:
Miracles are about to happen.

kirstie howard:
This year I'm going to learn as much as I can!

eden howard:
This year i'm gonna learn to fly.

emily howard:
Discovery of God and his plan for me.

melody infinger:
I just want God.

CLAIM GODS TRUTH!